Our ABA therapists give us praise all the time. Telling us that we are the most receptive parents they’ve interacted with in some time. That we really take the training they are giving us, and implement it. And it does show. We had one extremely rough month with Brendan at the beginning of al this change, but that’s expected when we do things differently than he is expecting. But the months that followed have really made us feel that we are doing a good job, and doing it right!
The meltdowns are fewer and farther in between. Brendan is more compliant about doing an unpreferred activity. We are better at preparing him for a transition. We take the time to tell him that we like the words he using, or that he’s playing nice, etc. And we have even seen some growth in him verbally expressing what he may be feeling (this is still a huge area of needed improvement, but we are seeing some!).
Halloween really took me by surprise and is what really made us see that we’re are doing things right! When we were leaving for my friends house, I told Deron that I was nervous about how Brendan would react when I say it’s time to go trick-or-treating, and time to go home. You see, there is something at my friends house that is not at our house. Something Brendan obsesses about... an Xbox. I already had it in my mind that there would be screaming, crying, hurtful words, when I would transition him to different things. When we set him up on the game, we told him to let us know if there was he needed. He would pop up to the window here and there and say, “I’m ok!”
When I asked him if he wanted to go trick-or-treating, he said, “I don’t know...” About 20 min later, he came out all on his own and said that he was ready to go. We went out for about 45 min, and returned back. He went back and played some more games. Then came out on his own to snuggle and play with the kids. He would go back and forth a few times, without me even asking him to do so. When it was time to leave, I went into the room and primed him, letting him know we would be leaving in about 10 min. He put down the controller and said, “I’m ready to go now.” 😳 I couldn’t believe it. No tantrums. No crying. No name calling. The ride home was peaceful (usually he would cry the whole way home). Things were peaceful. Maybe he was just tired, but maybe, the tools we were taught, and we are implementing, are actually working!
This is the growth that we have been training for! Deron and I have been working so hard to help us help B, and we are seeing our hard work come through in B’s behavior. We are so thankful that these services are available for parents. No one tells you how to parent a child with autism, and many times you just don’t know that changing one small thing, can really change the reaction you get from your child. We cannot say enough good things about this therapy.
If you are reading this and need help finding resources to help you and your child, please let me know! We were blind in going through these processes, but we’ve learned over the years where to go to get us and Brendan the help that’s needed.
